MY INDELIBLE HABIT.

Have you ever wanted someone badly, but they don't want you?

You need a friend, but you had cut all the ties for that one person, who is never gonna look at you again. Now you are alone.

All alone. You have everything, but you feel incomplete. Because whom you want is not there with you.

You are controlling yourself from being hurt again, but you can't stop getting hurt. Everything leads you to them, but they are not there for you. 

I thought you were different, not like the others. But you are the same, even worse than all. 

Whenever I had any emotional run, I used to search for you. You were the first person in my mind. Where are you now? Why can't I find you?

Oh, I forgot you are engaged with your new friend. And what about me? Where am I supposed to go?  Okay you told me "Go To Hell".

Am searching for the hell, where I can get even more pain, that I forget you, your name and the pain of your name in my life. Which is not erasable.

I tried erasing and rubbing your name from my heart. Not Realising that it is indelible.

I tried talking to strangers, but I end up being truly rude to them. Because I needed you, not them. I want you, I don't want others. I HAD you, all of you. You were my habit. My favourite habit.

My favourite habit,

to my haunting nightmare.

MY INDELIBLE HABIT.

~nxz